Friday, March 2, 2007

Tell me something...

The following is my recounting of a story that was told to me last night. It's my imagination and probably not exactly what happened, but what I pictured in my head when I was told the story. I'm going to tell it in the first person, even though it didn't happen to me...

I had a dream last night that Jesus came to me. My relationship with God is very close now and I've done many things that I can thank God for doing through me. He brought me out of the closed world of a closed country, out of a box within a box, into glorious freedom. So when I saw Jesus, walking towards me, I was enamored with his beauty. I saw him, in my dream, walking towards me, bathed in a light that I can only describe as emanating from within. He walked with calm smooth strides taking each step with a strange mix of care and abandon. Each of his steps mesmerized me. I could not stop watching how he walked, how his arms swung so lightly at his sides, like tree branches in a spring breeze. How his heels struck the ground with each step as if somehow a Clydesdale and a mouse were contained in one being. How his broad shoulders shifted and inspired me. I could not take my eyes off of him.

Then I saw his face, the face of the almighty God, the face of Jesus, the face of the Holy Spirit. It kept changing, he was all three, all at once, but I could only focus on one at a time. It was almost like looking at an optical illusion, but somehow it was more real than reality. It was as if I were only a shadow in comparison to this actual thing, this glorious object before me. If all your life you only saw mannequins, strange yes, and you never had the opportunity to see yourself, never saw anyone real, imagine what it would be like to suddenly see another human! He was like the die from which all humans were cast.

I stared at his face as he walked toward me, awe struck by the novelty of his face. How his eyes remained steadily on mine, how his visage morphed and flitted through the aspects of his nature. I couldn't ask for anything more. I had all I wanted at that point, there was no need for him to come closer. If he just continued to walk toward me for all eternity I would be content just staring at how he moved. But he got closer.

As he drew near I felt questions welling up inside me, what might he want to tell me when he gets here? What does he want to say? I could see his nose, bigger than I expected and perfect. I saw his cheeks, full and rich flesh, like he had just finished running. I could almost touch his chin, stout and framed, without defect. And there his eyes pulled me in. I have no words to describe his eyes, they are ineffable, expressionless, beyond comparison to even his changing face. If I were to describe them, it was like diving into a crystal lake and when you hit the water, you keep falling, as if the water were air. Falling through water, falling through a galaxy of healing water.

He came to me and please don't think me blasphemous, he came to me and he knelt before me. The creator of the universe, the almighty, knelt down before me. The creator of all knows how to humble himself, but this was too much for me, so I knelt as well. I reached for his hand and he went to hold mine and the moment he touched me, eternity entered my soul. That's the only way to describe it. Eternity filled me. I don't know how it's possible for all of creation and infinite space to enter into the heart, but God made us that way. You could ask all the scientists and psychologists how that could be possible and they could never tell you. But I know that it's possible because everything went in, every bit went inside my heart and I felt satisfied.

While I was reveling in the glory of being filled he began to lean in. I knew he was going to tell me something. I know that God has plans for our lives, that he makes sure that everything we go through is under his control and his eye. So I had this thought that he was going to tell me my calling, what I was to do here on earth. I was ready for that. But God wanted to tell me something different. What he told me has to do with the fact that God can have anything. God can make an entire other earth, a whole other heaven, with angels and creatures praising him. He can form universes at the snap of his fingers. Yet the one thing he cannot simply create is our love. He can't force us to love him. If you were to go to a billionaire and talk with him, what could you possibly offer him that he can't have, that he couldn't just buy? Nothing.

Jesus leaned in, I felt his hair brushing my cheek, and felt his breath warm on my ear and he said to me "Tell me something romantic."

2 comments:

Chops said...

This is creepy.

Dave said...

I guess I should explain a little bit more about there being no gender in the spirit, and all that, but maybe, just maybe people will understand it.